Able Seaman Kondratowicz stepped up to the helm to lead his lads into the fray against Altrincham Kersal 3rds this afternoon in what looked like a very tough fixture to open the 3rds campaign in a higher division following last season’s admirable promotion. Air Marshall Heath, having cajoled the team to promotion last season, was happy to stand on the sideline and watch the fruits of his labour take to the park once again under a new leader. No doubt the old dog will need to break out the flying helmet and goggles once the season gets under way, but it’s not ‘chocks away’ just yet!

From the kick off, Kersal pressed immediately into Moor territory under a bluish but cloud-ridden sky. At least the Friday deluge had been assuaged and the Moor ground looked in tip-top condition - lush grass and taking a long stud. The long stud (Perkins) was on alikadoo duty.

It was cheering to see a mix of old (SAS) and new (Kingsley and Ben ‘Hur’ Jones), borrowed (Ashy from Manchester Vets) and blue (Maz’s language aimed at his brother during the warm-up) – a veritable rugby wedding, but pleasing nonetheless as the team sheet reflected the entire spectrum of Moor rugby.

Kersal claimed first blood as they re-cycled well to create an opening for the impressive outside centre who strolled under the Hs to register 5 points, duly converted by drop-kick. At this stage it looked like the smaller Moor side would be quickly over-run by the Kersal power (rather like the 1^st XV against Wigan last week). However, Moor hit back soon afterwards. Maz stroked a punt (yes, I said PUNT!) into the blindside box and pounced on the mistake by the Kersal fullback to score wide out on the left. Having converted his own try, Maz jogged back to see the scoreboard (eh? – ‘ave we got one?) registering 7-7.

Kersal more or less scored from the kick off, then pressure from Moor saw a highly impressive belly flop from centre Lindsay register a try after Jaz worked an opening on the right hand side.

It didn’t last for long.

Kersal replied with some strong rugby and off-loaded excellently in contact to register a lead of 22-12 at half time.

Changes were made at half time as expected, and this enabled Moor to gain the upper hand as the second half progressed. Maz worked a beautiful blind-side kick from his own 10m line into Kersal territory, and the ever-alert Darryl Edwards (on as centre replacement) sped up the wing, fly-hacked once and then dropped onto the ball to score a crucial try on the right hand side – 22-17.  More defended their line magnificently shortly afterwards as the Kersal effort redoubled – they must have been disappointed to spend 15 minutes in the Moor 22 to emerge pointless!

The Kersal backs then showed a moment of magic to stroll over under the sticks for a converted try, then Maz stroked over a penalty to bring the score to 27 all. Then came the try of the match. Sutty, moved to fullback at half time, gathered a clearing kick just inside the Kersal half. He breezed around the first 3 defenders then straightened down the right wing, stepping inside the fourth then off-loading to the highly impressive and mobile Higgins. The latter drove relentlessly into the Kersal 22 and set a beautiful ruck. Ashy picked the quick ball and off-loaded to the supporting Able Seaman Kondratowicz who powered over for a deserved 5-pointer. Maz converted nonchalantly to give Moor a 34-27 lead, and it remained thus at the final whistle.

Yippee!

Due to his impressive opening display of leadership, Able Semen Kondratowicz was instantly promoted to Petty Officer (not surprising I suppose, as we all know he’s a bit of a Pet Shop Boy). I was never sure about the ability of his semen anyway!

Points of Note:

Higgy displayed voracity for the job today – he cleared rucks with aggression and had some fantastically deceptive runs for a tight head. James Ellis – WOW! It’s a pity Tomm couldn’t quite hit him in the lineout, but what a tremendous all-round display in open play – tackles, hits – the lot! He now just needs to carry the ball more often, but his pack leadership demonstrated ability beyond his tender years – a real gem.

Both Kondratowicz brothers showed tremendous leadership and decision-making powers. If they ever learn to like one another they could make a devastating partnership (although Maz can still be a little too lateral in his lines of running for the rugby purist).

The Colts that took part acquitted themselves with credit. Kingsley Child had an impressive debut on the wing (out of position) and made many crucial tackles which will do his self-confidence no harm. Ben Jones took to blind-side flanker with relish and worked tremendously hard for the team, making some typically bone-jarring tackles. Darryl Edwards came on at centre and showed just how devastating a runner he can be. The only downer was Sutty suffering a particularly severe dislocation of his elbow (whilst setting up the try of the match described earlier).

All-in-all a fantastic result at the start of the season. Moor 3rds will face many strong teams this season as they are now playing at the same level as the 2^nd XV, but not many will come stronger than Kersal. Petty Officer Kondratowicz will need all his powers to ensure that the team continues to perform at this higher level.