Autumnal conditions had given way to a warm and sunny Saturday as Moor travelled to Congleton in the hope of maintaining their unbeaten run against a 2^nd XV whose recent results had shown much improvement.

Moor dominated the early exchanges in terms of territory and possession, eventually accepting three points from a Kondratowicz penalty for hands in the ruck. The home defence held strong and Moor lost shape after recycling the ball through a number of phases by taking the wrong option instead of running directly. The referee consistently penalised hands in the ruck and playing on the floor for both sides with little scope for advantage.

Gradually, the home side forced itself into the reckoning and began to infiltrate Moor territory using a convoy of buses to trundle the ball effectively, and Moor gave away numerous penalties for ruck and offside infringements. Moor never got to grips with the home lineout, mainly because it was usually shortened and our chaps tend not to train very regularly so had no counter-measures. How difficult is counting to seven? How far is 10 metres? The lineout began to look like a game of musical chairs, without the music… or the chairs! ‘You put your left lock in, back row out, loose head, tight head, mix it all about!!’ Bloody funny unless you’re a jumper or a captain.  As far as ‘don’t stand in front of the back foot!’ is concerned – well, we’ll need a month of Wednesday night-school classes to sort that one out! Needless to say, Congleton managed to diesel up a few power plays and scored a try (which was duly converted) from a tap penalty whilst we were practising the two times table in double teapot pose.

Just before the half, Moor had a stroke of luck. A slapped lineout ball arrived at Jaz who dummied under pressure then tried a loop-it-over-the-top-super-slow-mo-lob to Flight Lieutenant Heath who was standing in the first five-eighth position admiring a rather unusual cloud formation to the south west. Luckily, Sutty had the top down at blind side wing and greased in to clear up Jaz’s garbage ball then flicked the Nitrous Oxide switch to burn around the Congleton backs – a bit like that Roadrunner moon slingshot move in Armageddon when Freedom and Independence are chasing the arse of that asteroid the size of Texas which Harry Stamper (Bruce Willis) wants to screw with his deep drilling equipment. Sutty didn’t reach the asteroid – but he offloaded to Jarhead Reynolds who carried on the move to score just to the left of the sticks (admired with pride by his captain standing some 50 metres back). Jaz converted and we went in with a 10-7 lead at half time. Actually, we didn’t go in – we stood on the pitch and had a rest whilst Ric Evans washed the dog-shit off his calf. Talking of calves, debutante Dave Nolan found to his dismay that he had a calf, and pulled it in the first 10 minutes – I hope it didn’t spoil his pot-holing (as HE calls it) on Sunday!

The second half was a torrid affair. Congleton buses came in threes and Moor were forced to play a defensive game in their own half. Ireland was given a yellow for slowing opposition ball and the Congleton skipper received similar penance for the same offence. The thing about the Moor 3rds though is that they have big hearts. If you could bottle and sell their spirit you’d make a fair bit o’ brass. We just don’t give up, and have a growing sense of self belief. Some of the second half tackling was immense – even Fl. Lt. Heath scuppered the odd bus; SAS Darwin wrapped up a few breakers with style; Charlie never misses 1-on-1 and Luke Whitehurst put in a snorter against his reedy wing opposition (who had been getting up his nose). Heath’s kicking was dreadful at best, which was a shame, because the need to turn Congleton around was obvious and could have resulted in some clear scoring chances if the usually dependable cannon hadn’t become a pea-shooter. Concerted Congleton pressure resulted in a well taken try by their wiry but strong number 8 who deserved his opportunity.

However, Moor made up for this with some excellent support play and chasing. Pete Fielding had taken the field to play with his son who had left the field with shoulder pains (having broken his collar bone last season), so the father-son partnership match will just have to wait! Fielding had no right to tackle and turn over the ball, but he did so and Moor were awarded a penalty in front of the sticks. Jaz slotted this, having already dispatched 2 similar ones, and Moor held the lead. Moor spirits and intensity stayed high to the final whistle which brought a 16-12 victory.

Fl. Lt. Heath congratulated his men on a spirited, aggressive performance which meant that the team had taken 20 points from 20 (including a walkover, admittedly) and they all should be proud of their opening to the season. In terms of possession and territory, Congleton probably deserved to win, but what price attitude, defence, hard work and taking opportunities when they come?

Jaz, what was all that stuff about sauerkraut in their clubhouse?